Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Living at the Pace of Pain - The Story


If any of you have been checking my blog for the last few months, you might be wondering, “Why isn’t she writing anything new?” Well, my summer took on a life of its own and I was out of commission for most of it.

In mid-June I had a lower backache for about a week. I took Advil and carried on with my life. But about a week into it, I began to have pain in my left leg. I let this digress for about two weeks. I know now that that was a HUGE mistake. I got to the point where I could not sit and I could barely walk.

I went to the doctor thinking it was sciatica, which he confirmed. But I continued to get worse.

A little over a week later God blessed me with the gift of a chiropractor. He was a friend of a friend and he decided to treat me for free. I have received thousands of dollars of treatment at no cost. That is a huge miracle and blessing for us.

I had an MRI and it showed that I had a disc extrusion between L5 and S1 that was on my sciatic nerve. I spent the next several weeks in the most severe pain I have ever experienced. There were many times when I was in the most severe pain (moaning and crying) that I felt God left me or wouldn’t answer me.  But I know that, of course, He was there and still is.  I wanted to unzip my body and step out of it to get away from the pain.  I would have 90-minute periods of pain (3 to 4 times a day for about 2 or 3 weeks) shooting down my left leg, throbbing in my hamstring, calf and heel.  I would have one of these “throbbings” in the middle of each night. My husband, Alan, would try to comfort me and he would end up pacing around the room, reading Psalms out loud, just proclaiming truth in the midst of the pain.

I have been slowly coming out of the pain. Every 2 or 3 weeks, I take a leap forward in my abilities. At this point, I am doing much better. I am not pain free and I still cannot sit, stand or walk for extended periods, but I can do all 3 now way more than before.

At this point, the bad pain feels like a bad dream.  I can’t believe I am past it.  There were times when I didn’t believe it would go away.  I didn’t see how it would end.

I am still unpacking what God wanted to do in me by allowing this situation.  I’ve journalled some of the things He has taught me (after the fact). During the pain, I was just managing each day, but God has been His usual faithful self and has brought forth good fruit.

I’ll share some of what I’ve learned in future entries.